The “Quick Fold” [a guy thing*]

[part of a lunchtime, phone conversation I had with my wonderful wife]

K: Is the green t-shirt on the bed clean?

Me: Ummm, yes.  I just took it out of the drawer last night.

K: OK, I wasn’t sure.  It was just wadded up.

Me: I did a “quick fold”

K: Oh… [I couldn’t see her face, but I’m pretty sure she had a grin and possibly rolled her eyes.  maybe not.]

As a public service, here is a description of the “Quick Fold”** ***:

1. Firmly grasp garment with hand – right or left will work.
   • NOTE: It is recommended that the “quick fold” only be completed with one hand.  Using one’s non-dominant hand enables one to multitask, e.g., eat a Picky Bar after a morning run.
   • NOTE: Unless you’re a risk-taking, life-on-the-edge-type (or a seasoned “quick folder”), DO NOT attempt “quick folding” two garments simultaneously, i.e., one garment in each hand.  There is a high risk you’ll end up with a large, co-mingled mass that will undoubtedly be mistaken for a pile of dirty clothing when you leave strategically place it on the bed.
2. Quickly rotate hand/forearm combination so that entire garment ends up wrapping around hand grasping garment.
   • NOTE: “Quick fold” will work in either the clockwise or counterclockwise direction.  If “quick folding” several garments, alternating direction with each successive garment may be considered part of one’s workout…probably not.
     
   • NOTE: Safety first!  Prior to beginning this step, check the area around you to avoid incidents such as: knocking over lamps, scraping the ceiling (thus causing a “ceiling popcorn” storm, which may lead to a whole host of other challenges), or hitting pets/family members who may be sleeping in the immediate vicinity during “quick fold” process.
3. Once garment is wrappedfolded around hand, carefully slide off and place in safe, secure, and convenient place, e.g., near one’s pillow if garment is worn while sleeping.
   • NOTE: If, during “quick fold” process, you encounter an odor, terminate process immediately.  Investigate source of odor and, if garment being folded is source, place garment in hamper.  Dropping garment to floor and vacating scene may will lead to other challenges.  If garment is not source, return to step 1 or 2 – depending upon where you were in the “quick fold” process.
     
4. If other garments require folding, repeat steps 1-3.
   • NOTE: You probably don’t need to re-execute safety check unless you or pets/family members have moved from original position.  If the lamp has moved, you may need to initiate earthquake safety protocol.  If the ceiling has moved, you may need to initiate earthquake or tornado safety protocol.
5. CAUTION: It is not advisable to “quick fold” if spouse, parent, drill instructor, etc. are in the vicinity.

There you have it: the “quick fold” – go forth…and fold!

Training Journal – 4/5/12:

• Current plan: 10-Miler Training
  
• Today’s session: 6 mile tempo run: warm, 4 miles @ 8:40, cool.
  
• Comments: Always nice to be home and run on familiar routes. I did 6.61 @ 8:38 overall – tempo splits at 8:30, 8:28, 8:29, & 8:31.  BOOYAH!