Dark Day

December 5, 2013 — Leave a comment

A year ago today, my father-in-law and friend passed away.  We still wrestle with trying to understand how it happened so fast: a nice lunch and afternoon spent together, followed by a drive to the hospital on Sunday evening with concerns…and then he was gone on Wednesday morning.

His death certificate tells the “what” – nothing can tell the “why”…and that sucks.  It was too fast, with little to no interaction with him, as he was in a coma most of the time…even though he walked into the hospital himself.

The cherished memory – really one of the few gifts that mattered last Christmas – was the wonderful evening we were able to spend with him on Tuesday as he had regained consciousness.  My wife summed it up perfectly in a Facebook post yesterday:

A year ago tonight…you woke up…talked…kissed us…told us how much you loved us…
and then we said good night…

What she didn’t write was that we all laughed too – which was special.  We left him Tuesday night, so hopeful…then Wednesday came.

My father-in-law was a special man:  A very humble man.  A decorated, Korean War veteran.  A dedicated, 40+ year, Lockheed retiree with an impeccable work ethic and keen business sense.  A man who loved and revered God.  A husband, father, and friend who loved, led, and cared for those whom God had entrusted to him.

I’m was and still am angry about this whole thing.  All of it.  Just angry.

Come to think about it, I’m angry about the way in which both my fathers were tragically lost.  Again, with the “what” vs. “why” comparison…and the fact that it simply sucks.

It’s just a dark day.


Training Journal – 12/5/13:

  • Current plan: ZRQL Marathon Training Plan – Taper Week 2 of 3
  • Today’s session: 5-mile run
  • Comments: Another chilly morning: 30° at run time.  I did 5.4 miles @ 7:56 avg pace, avg cadence 99 & a run time of 42:49. [Strava].  For the first time in five months, I ran in non-Hoka One One shoes (I know this ’cause I track these things!)  It felt pretty good to wear my Saucony Type A5s!
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